rob's requirements

one last self-centered blog for awhile-

a lot of you guys know that earlier this year, my family and I went through a pretty big change: after working at the same place and doing the same job for 16 years, I started working at a new place and doing different jobs. during that transition I started thinking about my non-negotiables- in my mind I could only work in certain environments, doing certain jobs and with certain resources. and then I discovered that I wasn't going to write my own plans- and then I discovered a new list of non-negotiables. I learned what I really need as opposed to what I thought I needed. and I learned that when these things go away that I need to find them again or things will be a little (or a lot)  "off" in my life. here are some things that I have discovered that I need these days:

1. my family
if I don't get to see them and talk with them and feel connected to them, I'm all out of whack. I don't ever want to do a job that keeps me from them for extended amounts of time. there are people who are away from their families for long stretches of time- and I ache for them. I have some friends who have lost their family or their family members- and I can't imagine what that does to them. through this transition, I think I'm actually able to be around my family even more- and I'm grateful for that. 

2. solitude
everyone knows that I'm super-introverted- but its not that I'm shy- its that I'm at my best when I'm quiet and able to connect with my thoughts and in prayer. my new role allows me to drive a bit, and has flexibility where I can gather my thoughts and talk things through with God. when I get too busy, my time with God, my journal, and my bible-memory are the first things to get squeezed out. I'm pretty busy, but I'm still finding time for being quiet. 

3. students
I'v been working with kids since the early 90's. I didn't realize what a big part of my life that they were until they were gone. I left a student role and began working with children- there are some transferrable concepts, but it wasn't the same. a friend asked me to fill in for him at his student ministry and it lifted my spirit like crazy. I could barely sleep the night before I spoke for his group. I woke up extra early because I was filled with energy. thankfully, I'm working with students again and its slow going, but I am so grateful for the opportunity.

4. creativity
I've always been creative- in the past, I used creativity in my messages to students, but when I changed roles, my creative outlet went away. I started creating dioramas for my plant and I was energized when I had a new outlet for creativity. I discovered that if I don't have a work-outlet for creativity, that I need to create one for myself. there is something about it that feeds my heart, that energizes me and pushes me forward.

5. organization
when my environment gets cluttered and messy, I stop thinking straight. Over the last year, I have found myself working in my dining room, in coffee shops and bookstores. it frustrated me to not have a spot for files, supplies and notes. I learned that if my work-environment isn't organized, then its up to me to work extra-hard to get organized. thankfully- I'm in a spot that is quiet, organized and clean.

6. nature
I had the opportunity to work in a city that had no nature in it. no hills, no trees, no trails. I would have taken the job if I had to, but I'm glad that I didn't have to. my walks on my trails, under the canopy of trees, and along streams nourish my soul.

7. margin
I hate being rushed. I hate being too busy to listen or to help. I hate being too busy to get in a good night's sleep or to exercise. so many people in my community are commuting hours and hours every day.  they have to-do lists that will never get done- I'm grateful that right now, I'm not in that boat. I have a long to-do list, but its important to me to get it done as efficiently as possible so that I can have margin to do the things that are important to me. 

8. a difference
recently a mom sent me a photo of her kid's room- it had letter that I had written him pasted to the walls. she said, "you're the only one who says encouraging words to him. he gets discouraged every day at school." I clearly remember thinking to myself, "I'm making a difference in someone's life! how long has it been since I was able to make a difference?!" that note energized me so much and gave me a longing to help more and more people. 

9. friends
the hardest thing about my transition is that there are so many friends that I don't see much anymore. but there are several that have been intentional about staying connected- and when I see them it is so life-giving. it doesn't make sense that I'm introverted on one-hand and crave friendships on another, but it makes sense to me. though this transition, I have gained many, many new friends that are wonderful additions to my life. God has blessed me with incredible friends- and seeing them gives me so much joy. I have learned that moving across the country would be so traumatic for me; and I'm grateful that God made a way that I didn't have to. 

who knows? maybe I'll go through another big transition and discover that these things weren't as important to me as I thought. until then, I'm grateful that these things are in my life and I plan on enjoying them as long as I'm able. 

God is love.
-rev-rob